Google Maps Is the Best

Check out the new feature that's on Google Maps. It rules.

"Danny Tanner Is Not Gay"

Today, my roommate got hooked up with Bob Saget tickets from work so instead of going to the gym, then watching the NBA Draft and the USA vs. Argentina game, I made the short trek through the Tenderloin to the Warfield after work. I think trading David Stern and American soccer for a free comedy show was a good deal.

I'm skipping a quick review of the opener Ryan Stout because I'm tired, not because he wasn't funny... Okay, maybe I'll say something about him because he was pretty funny. He liked to make fun of certain groups of people (little people, special people, poor people, the homeless) and then shake his head at the audience in disgust. I can't remember many of his jokes specifically but my favorite bit of his involved 25 Chinese kids who died in a fire. Apparently, they evacuated the burning school only to run around the building and then right back inside. All of the students were found in the wrong seats. Think about it...

Bob Saget was entertaining. While he was probably the most vulgar person I have ever listened to for an extended period of time, he was pretty hilarious too. He spent most of the night cursing, swearing, cussing, using profanity and apologizing for cursing, swearing, cussing and using profanity. His material ranged from making celebrity jokes to cracking on the audience to singing songs and they all involved various amounts of sexual references and innuendos. Sometimes it was over the top and awkward and sometimes it was right on. Like most good comedians, he spent a lot of time making fun of his family and himself. He also told his joke from The Aristocrats and talked about Half Baked, Dirty Work, America's Funniest Home Videos and Full House. I thought the Full House jokes were the best, which worked out seeing as most of the set was based on Full House references and stories. There were multiple jokes about him having sex with Kimmy Gibbler and him being gay with John Stamos. He also did a bit about San Francisco and slipped in jokes about Pan's Labyrinth, Gollum, the weird old guy from the Six Flags commercials, ET and leprechauns. The evening culminated with a song called "Danny Tanner Is Not Gay", which parodied the Backstreet Boys' "I Want It That Way". I thought that was pretty great.

... Since O.J. Had Isotoners...

I know this blog has been a little Kanye-heavy (partially because I'm avoiding all things T.I. so I can be surprised when the album drops next week, and partially because everything that interests me in rock and indie aren't coming out that soon) but here's the video for "Stronger". It's a departure from Hype Williams' usual work and I think it's pretty decent in an "Akira meets hip hop meets 80s fashion" kind of way. Also, Cassie is in the video and she's very nice looking.

Fight! Fight! Fight! Bite! Bite! Bite!

Not quiiiiite right, but maybe close enough.

You can do it too.

Let Me Upgrade You

Remember a few weekends ago, when I got robbed? Here's a quick update:

Last Saturday, a couple police officers stopped by the house. Apparently, they caught some guy trying to steal a bike and upon searching him they found my checkbook. They asked me a few questions, I identified the checkbook and they were on their way.

For some reason, they were more interested in the burglary from the loft (Robert's bike), which happened months ago. I guess they stopped by the loft looking for me so I'm guessing they caught the guy some where in SOMA. All that seems a little moot considering the item in question (my checkbook) was taken from my current house, but what do I know?

So that's that. I haven't heard from the police since the weekend. I know it's unlikely but hopefully they can recover some of my stuff, especially all that crap I had that can't really be replaced.

Don't Leave Me Hangin' on Like Yo-yo

As if I don't love Judd Apatow enough already...

Michael Cera gets fired from Knocked Up
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All I Want to Do is Ride Around Shinin'

It only took me 8 minutes to realize that Pedal ID is more fun than my blog.

I Know a Girl, She Puts the Color Inside of My World

Check out this video of John Mayer and Kanye West:



A few observations:
- John Mayer's head is 'uuuuuge!! I mean, physically... I know he's about 6'4" and large people have large heads, but still...
- Kanye has been saying "stuntastic" a lot in recent interviews. I wonder if it's the thesaurus next to "fergilicious" and "hyphy".
- In an interview with Mayer a while back, I remember reading about him trying out stand-up comedy. His agent and manager were thinking it was a bad idea but I think he's actually pretty funny. Even though he's obviously one of those smug, intelligent types, I can't say I didn't laugh.
- The song actually sounds pretty good but I still think Graduation has a decent chance of flopping. On his first album, he came in on a huge wave of hype with "Through the Wire" and the car accident; people weren't impressed with "Diamonds from Sierra Leone" (until Hova tore up the remix) but he still had the Jon Brion collaboration hype, the "Gold Digger" single and "George Bush Doesn't Care About Black People"; this upcoming album doesn't seem to have that sort of fire behind it. Even with all the John Mayer and Chris Martin talk (and Jon Brion again) I am skeptical. Maybe all the the John Mayer and Chris Martin talk is what's making me skeptical. Who knows? I hope it is great but as a fan, I'm mildy concerned...
- Finally, John Mayer is the singer-songwriter version of Justin Timberlake. Like JT, he started off doing the teeny bopper pop bit, moved on to more mature themes gaining some street cred along the way, dated a pop star who isn't as hot as people tend to believe, starred in some well-received sketch comedy skits and managed to overcome the fact that he's just a big nerd. I don't know where his incredible ability to shred a blues lick comes into play though... Maybe it's equivalent to Justin's dancing? I don't know... I'm just waiting for him to carry a crappy movie in a supporting role (as JT supposedly did in Alpha Dog).

The Week Never Starts Around Here

This weekend was fairly uneventful. I didn't go out at all at night or do anything social at all, for that matter. I relaxed a bit, killing a lot of time on the Internet and in front of the television. It wasn't completely unproductive though. I got my car serviced, visited my parents, did some laundry, went for a run around the steeps near my house (a couple of which I ended up skating later in the day) and cleaned up around my room. I also took the second step in replacing my stolen goods (I'll write about the first step later this week) by getting a new watch. Coming off of three consecutive action-packed weekends, this one was a much needed, low-key couple of days. All in all, it was a pretty good weekend.

All I've Got is a Pair of Ice Creams

I love ice cream and frozen yogurt. This is me shoving my face full of ice cream in Japan, at a place called Ice Cream City. I don't remember what flavor I got but it was delicious.



It's not exactly Ice Cream City but the corner store, which is less than a half a block from my front door, just got a frozen yogurt machine. Hopefully, I don't look like a sumo wrestler the next time you see me. I think I'm in trouble...

My Partner Yellin' "Too Soon! Don't Do It!"

UGK (feat. OutKast) - International Player's Anthem

This video rules. Hard.

When My Next Album Drops I Ain't Wearin' No Shirt

I was going to write something more interesting today but I didn't get around to it. I will try and come up with something in the next couple of days. In the meantime, here's a post I've been sitting on for a few days...

I'm pretty excited about these albums and you should be too:

T.I. - T.I. vs. T.I.P.
The Cool Kids - The Bake Sale
The New Pornographers - Challengers
Kanye West - Graduation
Interpol - Our Love To Admire
Common - Finding Forever
Rilo Kiley - Under The Blacklight
Arthur & Yu - In Camera
Lupe Fiasco - The Cool

Also, Lyrics Born, Kid Sister, CRS, Bonde Do Role, ?uestlove/Pharrell, M.I.A. and some others...

I Want To Ride My Bicycle!

My bike.